When we decided to let artificial intelligence write a script for a new VR zombie mission, we had no idea what we were getting into. We just wanted to save some time and maybe get a fresh idea. What we got was something between a digital dream, a nightmare, and an utterly absurd sitcom from a post-apocalyptic future.
A Start Like an Action Blockbuster
The script started promisingly. In an abandoned city in the middle of nowhere, a siren blares, smoke fills the air, and zombies slowly rise from piles of trash. It looked promising until the AI introduced the main character: “Tony, a taxi driver who can only do kung fu when wearing sunglasses.” Well, we thought, creativity is appreciated. But then his sidekick joined in: “a talking toaster named Krupicák 5000,” who fired toast instead of bullets.
To top it off, their base was located in a former carpet store, now serving as the “Temporary Station Against Zombies and Mother-in-Law Visits”—a name the AI claimed was key to world-building.
Dialogues Worthy of an Oscar. Or at Least a Diagnosis
For example, this scene:
TONY: “They’re here! Quickly, Krupicák! Switch to extra crispy mode!”
KRUPICÁK 5000: “Timed! Toasts full of love and lead!”
ZOMBIE: “grunting”
Another unforgettable exchange:
TONY: “Why do you always speak in metaphors?”
KRUPICÁK: “Because reality tastes better with a bit of poetry and cheese.”
Then came the boss level—a zombie gorilla on a skateboard who spoke French and had a weakness for jazz. It even had its own musical intro that triggered a mini rhythm game.
Gameplay Inspired by Something Between Tetris and Opera
The AI decided that a traditional shooter was too boring, so it added a rhythmic element. To shoot, the player had to dance. Literally. If you wanted to unlock a grenade, you had to perform a perfect moonwalk. And to reload? Operatic singing: “Laaa zombiiiiaaaa!”
Players could also choose the “emotional state of the character” before each mission—such as “passive-aggressive,” “late puberty,” or “love triangle with a vending machine”—which changed HUD colors, lines, and the way Tony held weapons (for example, in “late puberty” mode, he held the shotgun like a guitar).
There Were Enough Enemies… Maybe Too Many
In addition to classic zombies, the AI generated:
- Zombie clowns with bubble blowers
- Flying zombie fish with laser eyes
- A zombie version of Elvis Presley singing “Brain Me Tender”
- Zombified fitness influencers attacking with protein shakes
- A dangerous NPC named “Uncle Lojza,” who had no weapons but could persuade players to give him everything because “he just needs it for a moment”
An Ending Like a Philosophical Essay… by an Ape
Tony ultimately had to decide: save the world or join Krupicák and open a café together called “Toasty & Silence.” The game ended with the quote: “Sometimes it’s not important to win. Sometimes it’s important to be crispy.”
After the end credits, there was a bonus cutscene: Tony and Krupicák playing chess with a digital reincarnation of Einstein, while outside, a new invasion of zombies with pet heads raged.
Trailer (voice like from 90s movies):
“In a world where zombies don’t die but dance…
Where a toaster is the most reliable weapon…
And where the fate of humanity is decided during a breakdance battle…
One man and his toaster come to save the world.
Tony & Krupicák: Crispy Apocalypse – Coming soon to your VR headset.”
What’s Next? Zombie Cats from Space!
We’re preparing a sequel tentatively titled: “Galactic Catterville: Meow and Brains”. In this epic VR ride, players face an invasion of intergalactic zombie cats that purr in Morse code and control human thoughts with hypnotic tails.
The main hero will be a cybernetic mouse named Cheddartron and his mentor—a wise holographic turtle teaching Zen calm in the fight against scratching chaos.
The Future of VR? Probably Weird. But Definitely Fun!
